just so cindy's joshua won't keep asking if i "have the courage to take those pills yet?"

it seems that the world has come crashing down, everywhere you go its just bad news. seems like the in thing now. i wish i could say that on the contrary, i'm having a fabulous time, that things are going fantastically great for me, but unfortunately, no, they are not. sometimes you wish for change, and sometimes what you wish for does come true, but the change you get, is not the change you wanted.

and the more you can't have something, the more you will chase after it. its human nature to.

i'm losing sleep and putting on weight. how depressing.

29 Sept - we had a little mini belated 2nd time birthday celebration for joan darling. dinner & shopping, not forgetting there was some quarreling and crying on the phone on my part (i'm sorry darling for spoiling the fun for awhile :( ) after that we ktv-ed! martell martell, our love. again my darlings!